Hey, so I am part of a Facebook group devoted to fighting for better gun control (it was founded after the Pulse nightclub shooting), and I got a little note in my notifications that Samantha Bee has had an episode devoted to gun control. The idea was that we all should contact Sam and thank her for her putting the issue in the spotlight.
So I wrote to the email identified, and I did something a little whimsical. I signed, after my name, “aka Cinderella”.
This name and I go back a little bit, back to 2007 and the LA Writer’s Strike. I was unaware of the strike- I’m a scientist- and I didn’t realize these men and women were exhausted after a day of picketing. I just wanted to go to Starbucks and get myself a coffee. I was annoyed- the patio was full of people that were slouching around and no one moved when I asked to get by so I could get a coffee. I think someone asked me if I was a writer. I write novels for fun, so I said “yes” and they asked me if I was working. I was working as a scientist, so I said “yes”.
To compound this PR nightmare, I think I met Seth MacFarlane and was very rude to him. I also think he scared me so incredibly much that I ran away from him, and since I was wearing floppy old sandals, they started coming off my feet. I panicked and left one behind, reaching down to snatch up the other and literally run away.
I hid in a couple of stores for a while until I was calmer and made my way back- I don’t know for sure, but I think Mila Kunis found me and convinced me to go back for my sandal- and when I returned it was even more terrifying for me. I was focused only on getting my other sandal back and running away yet again.
I don’t know what happened but I managed to get away from all the scary people- funny story, I think Alex Borstein (or someone that looked like her) showed up and asked what was going on and I thought she was just a concerned passerby. I hugged her and asked her to protect me from Seth and the others. Wow, right? Anyway, eventually I ran away and someone asked me what I was doing “now” and since of course I have no idea what that means to screenwriters I thought of my job as a scientist and I said I was working on “saving the world.” Something like that. So I wasn’t lying.
That was what, over a decade ago? I haven’t thought too much about those incidents- my primary goal for many years was simply to banish them as nightmarish thoughts- but lately they’ve returned to my conscious mind as something rather funny. I am not sure I can use this in writing- I mean, it is too cliché, me losing a sandal? Granted, it was an old, ugly, probably smelly, leather flat instead of a fancy glass slipper and I was wearing cutoffs, a tank top, and a white shirt instead of a ball gown, but the reference there is clear. I can’t write about this rather comical (in hindsight) encounter.
Anyway, yes, my brush with fame was to insult people, act completely crazy, hide ASAP, and try to stay hidden. I figure I did a good job, and so I’m not worried about putting this little story on this blog- it gets very little traffic, so I’m pretty safe.
If this does get some attention, can someone tell Seth MacFarlane I said hi? I sent him flowers for his birthday, I hope he liked them. It’s a bit annoying, I’ve been trying to apologize for years and I have no way to reach him.
PS- readers who like my fiction, I’ve finished editing Infinity, my most recent completed novel, and later today I hope to get back to working on Diamond. I have been sidetracked by science project planning (details here) and also by the fact that Diamond covers some difficult subject matter. If you recall, it’s the story of how a woman overcomes incredible odds to triumph over her stalkers, with a little supernatural help.